Why Fear Is A Choice Ready To Be Made
We all have goals and aspirations. For many people, that’s it. A dream is but a dream and it will forever stay that way (as some are meant to) unless action is taken. Nevertheless, there are also those ambitions that are bold and terrifying. You ever get that twisting knotted feeling in your gut just thinking about it? You know that you’re sure to fail at a few things along the way and that if you don’t, you’re still playing it safe.
The choice is neither doing it afraid nor unafraid. The choice is in which fear you’d rather embrace: the fear of failing, or the fear that an older version of yourself will look back and regret not ever fully trying? The greater hope is in choosing the latter, adjusting your space, and taking action to bring that dream to fruition. Sounds simple enough, but where do we begin?
DROP THE IDEA OF PERFECTION
The dream may be perfect to you, but where you start will look nothing like it. The journey may be full of u-turns, break-downs, and off-roading into uncharted territory. It could very well be inconvenient, messy, confusing, etcetera. The road to roads to greatness and success are never great. Don’t expect the path to your dream to be either. Rather, have an open mind and be open to opportunities. Be willing to create opportunities where none seem to exist. Above all, remember your reason why and allow room for that why to evolve as you do along the way.
MOTHER MAY I?
Give yourself permission because you don’t need it from anyone else. Choose something that will allow you to start today. If the idea of creating an actionable plan is too daunting, then start with an actionable outline. As cliche as it is, the important thing is that you start. Just as important as starting is that you keep going. It may not be on a consistently frequent basis in the beginning, that’s okay. Choose pockets of ‘extra’ time to work towards it. Baby steps are still steps. Setbacks are learning experiences. When you have those tired days because you got very little to no sleep the night before, keep going. Make sure you’re surrounded by the right people, especially during times like these.
EXAMINE YOUR INNER CIRCLE
It’s imperative to take time and note the people closest to you: the relationships that make up your inner circle. Never has a successful person stated that the grind wasn’t lonely. To know who you surround yourself with is of the most importance. Although there are certain different types of people we should have around us, it’s crucial that they all are at least:
SUPPORTIVE - Understanding that people show their support in different ways will make a world of difference. It could be lending an ear, offering to be a resource or connection, or simply sharing what you do. Though, everyone’s support will not be identical. Appreciate, while remembering that a person doesn’t have to understand every single detail of what you’re trying to do. Do not attempt to force them. No one will ever love or slightly obsess over your passion or dream the way you will. Why? There’s only one you. Be grateful for that.
POSITIVE - Positivity and bullshit are not synonymous. Constructive criticism is not rejection. If you have individuals in your life who wholeheartedly believe that everything you do is great, then awesome. All the more reason to make sure you cling to those can smell your funk. I’m referring to the person whose opinion you may not feel like hearing yet you soak up every word they speak because you know it’s pure truth. They tell it straight with no chaser. They also don’t allow you to settle for less than because they know deep down you’re capable greater. These people may be far and few, but make sure you value them.
I’m not suggesting that you expect your inner circle to be supportive and positive 100% of the time. Realistic and practical expectations are key. They, and you, are human. Just know that if immediate people around you choose to mostly support you and sprinkle some positivity/honesty your way, then you’re starting off with a decent foundation.
BONUS - Find someone who is willing to, or already is, grind the way you are. Even with all the support and positivity in the world, nothing compares to having a person in your corner who ‘gets it.’ Speaking from personal experience, having someone to relate to who is living their own twisting journey of building and paving their own way is a blessing. Again, your journeys will not be the same, but a little insight can carry you a long way.